Thursday, March 13, 2003
The Name of the Game
1. I shall aim to post at least every other day. Hangovers will not constitute a get-out clause.
2. While most things are Fair Game, what goes on under the duvet stays under the duvet. Unless, of course, it is simply too juicy for words. Then we'll talk.
3. If I can't find something nice to say about someone, I will shut up. Usually.
4. Habitual use of the words, "actually", "you-know", and " puh-leeeeze", and contractions like "IMHO" or "LOL", are heinous crimes against the English language. They will be treated as such. So, if I find myself banged up in a East Croydon tower block, with a sex-starved, homicidal ninety-year-old and only five cans of Special Brew for company, then I will have only myself to blame.
5. Inevitably there will be opportunities to muse about Music and Art and Other Worthy Things. I will try not to take myself too seriously.
6. I shall never delete.
7. Techno-twaddle on HTML source code, moans about Blogger functionality, or reviews of the latest hi-tech, whizz-bang, in-yer-palm, does-everything-but-mix-the-Martinis, and-hey-I've-got-one-and-you-haven't, wowtastic Whatevers are the domain of creatures I really do not want to share my Smoked Salmon Fishcakes and Chips with. I shall avoid them.
8. Political rants often offend. More importantly, they reveal me to be a Proper Little Prat. I will remember this while trying to set the world to rights.
9. I shall ignore all of the above rules for the sake of a witty riposte, a cheap laugh, another drink, or a halfway-decent shag.
10. I shall try to be good.
And now? Let's play. . .