Monday, March 24, 2003
I have just arrived home, and I hate the world. For a start, there were far too many Muscle Marys hogging the pec deck at the gym. All of them way prettier than me. So, of course, a Hissy Fit was called for. It was duly delivered. I Flounced Out.
Off then to calm down at my local Islington poofeteria. There was a five-minute wait to get served. When I enquired who I'd have to f**k to get a drink, I was told exactly who. Not even I am that desperate for a pint of Stella.
So Flounce numero deux. This time to Sainsbury's for a bottle of red, as they still haven't got any bottled water. Five-hour wait in queue for someone paying with money-off tokens you get in magazines. I hate queues at the best of times. This not the best of times.
As I leave the supermarket, a Child gets in my way. Thereby causing me to miss the 274 bus. Consider tossing said Child in direction of on-coming traffic. Content myself with growling menacingly at it. Unfortunately, Child not taken in for one second. Child hurls not only abuse but her Bounty bar at me.
I will be my pleasant, thoughtful, kind and caring self tomorrow. Tonight you really do not want to know me.